Do it with someone
A page written alone is worth having. A page read aloud to one person who listens is worth more.
With a friend
Each of you writes your own page first, alone. Then meet somewhere you will not be interrupted, and take turns: one stage each, back and forth. It takes about an hour.
With your father, or your son
Ask him the twelve questions and write down what he says, in his words. Do not correct his memory. You will hear things you did not know, and you will have them on paper when he is gone, or when you are.
If he will only answer three, take three. Start with one, four and twelve: where he began, who helped him, and what he would hand on.
With a group of men
Six is enough and eight is the most. One stage a meeting for twelve meetings, or three stages a meeting for four. Each man reads his answer. Nobody is made to.
The rules of listening
- No advice. He did not ask what he should have done.
- No topping. Your worse story can wait for your turn.
- One question is allowed: “What happened next?”
- What is said in the room stays in it.
- Thank him. Then it is the next man’s turn.
What this is not
It is not therapy and it does not replace it. If writing a stage brings up something that will not settle, or you are thinking of harming yourself, talk to a doctor or a counselor, or call your local emergency number.
Now write your own
Twelve questions. A few honest sentences each. Nothing you type leaves your browser.